Close for Oscars

I'm not sure why. It's like a movie, I'm the lead actress. Things just happened. Or maybe whoever, god, or whichever that you prefer to control your destiny, yourself whatever. It's like a board game. Or a game of barbie doll (just that we're less perfect that Barbie). And they control people walking around in your life, and sometimes you bumped into someone or something that you dislike, you avoid. Then there are times when you have something you wished to see of more often, you try to reenact what had happened when that something happened, just to try out your luck.

Something has been disturbing me as of late. I have a feeling I'm thinking too much or if it's real, I'm in deep shit.

Gone were the innocence

Life was simpler not when apple and blackberry were just fruits. It was simpler when little shiny speckles on the ground seem like little diamonds, or a cheaper alternative, glitters. Shines under street lights and it amazes me everytime, and I always loved walking in the dark. Because you see the floor shine back at you. Then one day, as I was happily walking in the dark on top of those shining glittery roads, I never listened to what my mom told me, like she said, there were glass shattered into pieces that's why it reflects lights. I was happily walking till I got a cut for stepping into a pile of what was known as "glitter" and it was just small cuts. There, I learnt, not all things you see that is good on the outside, reflects what it actually was. What seemed like a happy fruit on the outside, may be spoil rotten deep down from the core. What seem like glitter and shiny diamonds, that may not be a fallen star from the sky, they are shattered glasses from the past which may bring you scars. Even stars high up which seem like diamonds, they're actually colliding each other, billions light years away, they're actually not as pretty as it seem far far away.


And then today I saw a reflection at the door that says happiness. Is that a sign?


I shouldn't let things disrupt me at this moment of time. It broke me once, it won't break me another time.

I love topshop

New shit from topshop, some online some from Singapore. Amex FTW additional 10% off at Singapore coincide with mother's very good mood, I travelled from Vivo to Wisma Atria just to get my shoes, and my cousin had to sit and wait for me to try on shoes :D Last pic stolen from the lookbook cause it was sold out on the web and I can't find pictures.

And the best thing is, when you see those items online, they look so damn good, but in real life, they look even better.

How can I ever live without you?

MH129

When the air stewardess announced that we've arrived at Melbourne International Airport, to visitors welcome to Melbourne and to residents, welcome home. I don't know whether I should feel welcome "home" or just welcome to Melbourne.


Back to reality. Last semester, last hurdle.

Biggest dreamer and loser

You know who're the people I'm most envious off??

Those who are doing something that they are capable off, and best of all something that they love, they like.


If only.


So many options, yet restricted. Brainwashed or not, it's not up to me to decide. I hate having decisions to be made and decisions that are to be made to determine what I decide. It sucks to be relying on someone who doesn't know you well enough, or a complete stranger to judge what you have to do, and where you want to go.

And what if, what if where I want to work, the interviewer do not know me and judge me based on first impression? And what if the results that I present is not what they expected? Will they listen to the other side of the story?

It's the last semester, I don't think I've ever felt so pressured in my life. This path that I choose, might make it or ruin my entire life. But then again, when I'm given the chance, I might pull through or pull myself out.

Maybe this is why I have been having migraines and racing heart beats, ups and downs, all that I've been through, is it enough? Am I prepared? What do I want?

I have so many things I want to do and I would love to pursue, cooking, tailoring, photography, interior designing, all these that involve my daily lives activities which I love. Clothes, food, memories, moments, home.

To be very honest, living in Melbourne is sort of like a honeymoon moment for me, the freedom, the peaceful life (albeit sometimes not so) and just living alone. It gives me time, it makes me zen, I feel at peace. Because I could hear my thoughts clearly and I receive good feedback from what I'm doing. But living there is hard, another dilemma, should I go or should I stay? Parents say I'm too young to be applying for a PR but who knows what might happen to our dear Malaysia and they say rulings change. So many uncertainties, but should I go against or just follow? I'm confused. =(

Perhaps, the way I'm pursuing may be named the "In Denial" path, but right now, I don't want to think. =( It's my last week to be spent with my family. So many errands to run, and so many things I've yet to keep my promise to. =( I felt like a big fat loser, if only I could run a thousand miles with unlimited stamina. Why can't things just fall into place nicely for once?

In the closet

Another member into the collection. :))))) Pictures up soon!!

In the mean time, please help me clear some of my clothes, they're dirt cheap and they're either new or only worn once (90% new lol) Click HERE to go to boudoir!! :))))

Women

You know the best thing about home?? Not so much of the freedom, but the pampering I get. Ahhhh.....

I've only washed my hair like, 5 times since I came back?? NO I'm not a dirty poo wtf, I get hairwash from people :D So so so good, you get head massages and neck too! :P love



love my nails =D So pretty. And it was done my a male manucurist. PRO!!! He drew those bows for all the fingers in less than 5 minutes *salutes*

Some loot from MAC in Hong Kong. :) I think I'm a convert now :D:D:D:D I'm always spoilt for choice while choosing the eyeshadows there. nommm I left this mineralize eyeshadow, it's damn blue :O



Yeay! I was so convinced by the lady in Shiseido, she was doing tests on our skin (ie taking really really close up pics of our skin to determine what skin type we are, my skin is normal! :D And it's oily on the t-zone meh why am I surprised.) And she was telling us what should we do, what products, why we should and all. I'm currently using the White Lucent range and I wouldn't say my skin is now flawless, but it has improved. :D

And then it lead me to this topic/discussion thing. Very closely related to real life. Skincare, is like love. When someone tells us/experienced something that is good for them, something promising, like a commitment, we will fall head over heels, trust it, be loyal to it. Just like how we trust in finding someone to love for life, when they make a vow that they ought to commit for their lifetime, the commitment, just like how we choose to purchase our skincare products, we commit to it, we're willing to give it a try, willing to sacrifice a little not knowing what holds the future.

And then when something breaks your trust (breakout breakup wtf), you'll stop using it, stop trusting it, leave the product, leave that person.

So true no?

Ribbons

Well if you don't already know I disappeared to Macau/Zhuhai/HongKong for 5 days. And it was hell tiring, cause I was smart enough to not bring a trolley bag to drag around T_T I had to carry them fml =(

Nothing much happened except for getting fat, eating, getting fat sleeping and shopping then sleep shop watch half a match with half my eyes closed and sleep then ferry train ferry train walk car bus etc around macau hongkong and zhuhai.

It was macau-zhuhai-macau-hongkong-macau. My passport is running low on pages LOL.


But it was fun. Cosmetics in HongKong are so bloody cheap!!! And please do NOT get cheated by shops in HK cause you can find the exact same things for 10 times cheaper in Zhuhai!!!!! I think I saw a pair of shoes going for like 200 RMB, going for HKD1k plus WTF!

MAC is approximately 10% cheaper in HK (Eyeshadows going for HKD 130, which is approx RM 56, KL going for RM 65 if not mistaken) And Shiseido is sooo much cheaper!! I've been using this White Lucent range and it's going for RM 180 for the softener and it's RM 160 after conversion in HK! And the serum is RM 316 after conversion in HK and is going for RM 400 plus in KL!!! Shocking much????!!!!


On another more shocking note. I've once again proven the theory that what Ting Ting wants/needs, TingTing gets. :P

I still remember about 6 months ago I fell in love with the blue one. Then I decided I like the lilac more. Then the tan came in place. I was torn between the tan and the lilac. And then twists of fate, numerous visits later, multiple phone calls begging the mother to buy but rejected, I made the decision of getting it with my own money.

I once told a friend when she asked about my bag, when she asked me how much was it I replied, I need to get a job to pay this baby off. We both nod in agreement. :) I love how some bimbotic friends will agree with some purchases that we've made and we see it as an investment instead of wasting things away. There are always two ways in seeing things, I prefer it like this. :P Well, for example if you don't get your Chanel bag this year, congratulations, they've just hiked their prices by 27% in Europe.

Ladies, here's the reason on why I got myself a job.

Well there IS love at first sight afterall. :)

Modern Day Fairytale

Today mom told me something, a similar topic to what I've seen on Sex and the City's episodes, to be exact, the Turtle and the Hare about Carrie's friend getting married.

And she whispered to her, best of all the husband loves her more than she does.

Is it okay to marry someone who loves you more than you do, so that you take more than you give? Or so I thought the olden day myth was that when you know he or she is the one you can feel it, you love both equally, there are unrequited love, something that one can not explain but only those involve can feel it. Instincts, feelings, emotions whatever. They just KNOW it, or so I've read or watched or felt it.

If one do not marry someone who loves he or she more than the partner does, will it be lasting??


And that got me questioning, is it ever lasting if one party sacrifices more? By giving and taking?? Is my perception that there are balance in between or there are no equal amount of love given is right? I'm confused.

Where for Arty thou?

You know it is gonna happen when I posted that picture didn't you?? YSL Arty Ring is finally mine. It was like the same old love story. At first sight, it was just, it's just okay, nothing fantastic. And then there will be someone something to encourage you saying it is THE one. And then other environmental factors that reinforces the urge. Then and I finally wanted to say YES and it was gone. I was heart shattered. And one fine day, fate struck us, it was there again and so I proceeded. And pressed checkout. :) And i think I snapped up a pretty good deal seeing that it's even cheaper than the US store retail price :P And you know how they say shopping in the US is always cheaper but not this time, no thanks to the low pounds exchange rate. :)

Like they say, to be invulnerable, you will have to guard your heart with little luxuries. And when they say it's fated, fate always comes with a price tag.