Sunday, February 26, 2012

Self Love

Haven't been treating my body well enough lately. Binge eating, junk food, beer, alcohol and just plenty of bullshit I'm stuffing into my body (not to mention muffins oh god). And today I skipped breakfast and only break my fast after gym. It felt good, I feel more enpowered. I've read about this "cutting" thing that's part of an intermittent fast, whereby it's for people who have not much control once they start eating (LIKE ME!!!), it's basically for those who start eating, and will continue to nibble on something (especially in big groups, oh the horror) and continue to eattttttt till there's nothing left. It's a VERY BAD habit I have, and I admit, my so called self control is close to zero, and you know, you gotta try new ways to curb these bad habits from happening again and again. I'm going this fast thing prolly 2-3 times a week, each time *cross fingers* hopefully 14 hours long. So it's basically you eat at 9pm, your next meal will be say tomorrow's 11am. Well you get to sleep so it's not THAT BAD. Or if you're strong enough, do the 24 hours fast, so you eat at 9pm, your next meal will be at 9pm.

I'm still not too sure about these mechanics but I still drink water (if not I will die) and I have a piece of fruit in between. Listen to your body. For me if I eat a serving of fruit, I won't be all ROAR I AM HUNGRY EAT ALL THE CAKE instead I'll drink another cup of water and continue with work. We'll see how it goes, it's only the starting phase.

Lately I've been hitting the weights section at the gym, ignoring mr muscle men's moaning sounds (can be very very disturbing) and just do some barbell/dumbbell curls, squats, lunges. All I can say is don't let the others affect you. You may not be using a 20kg dumbbell because you're not as strong YET, but just keep your form right, feel the burn (OH YEA love that). I may not be as lean as Jamie Eason or fit like J Lo but each day I look in the mirror, I love what I see. It's all about positive body image, For example, I completed a track for biceps during BodyPump and that satisfaction is just through the roof! I've never completed every single move during any bicep track but I pushed it this time round and it feels gooooooood with extra Os). I believe one day them muscles will burn off the fats trapped underneath. :P I can't wait to see my soon-to-be toner arms. Well at least I'm working on it. ;)

And trust me, you feel much much much happier when you love yourself more. We focus too much on picking on the negative things like I have so much pores my nose is huge my brows are bushy my belly is bulging. Why not find nicer things to tell your body like my eyes sparkle my lashes are quite long my collar bones are quite sexy and I am bringing sexy back?

I've been getting messages from people telling me oh I will never find love because I'm fat. My mom tells me I'm fat, my dad offered me Xenical to lose "not much, just about 15kgs" and I get called names etc. If you're not going to love yourself, who else is going to do that? No one is more unattractive than a self loathing creature roaming on the streets.

Chin up buttercup! You wouldn't know how much someone is out there wanting to love you. So start loving yourself now and better things will follow.

Now onto the toughest part of this cut, cutting down on sugar. :/ Bye bye muffin. =(

1 comment:

Suba said...

Love your attitude about positive body image Keep going. You're not alone.=)