Monday, May 31, 2010

Lost

I have been gaining weight. God knows what the fuck is wrong with me I am two four seven hungry. Haven't been running cause of the cold cold weather. I blame period. It's coming I swear.

And I foresee that days will be buried with tears because exams are approaching, and the assessments will be one by one revealed, and it will be harder than I thought. I am preparing my heart for the worse that has yet to come. All these bad things happening of late, is a test of my patience, my strength to overcome all these tough situations. I need to be stronger than what I am. So many weird things, so many crazy things going on. (btw, Lily Allen's "The Fear" just came on.)

And tomorrow, two of my major assignments will be given back. And after that I'll be heading to the city, just for some breather. I need my time out. I am having that feeling again, that sensation I had approximately 8 months ago. Something hit me so hard, that gave me the strive. To succeed, or to proof people wrong, whatever. I need to find back the urge to fight. I need to find back the willpower in me that gave me the kick, that lead me to what I think, it was success.


I am really scared. Or what I perceived as fear.


Please let me go through this again.

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